Well, this has been a whirlwind of two weeks for me. I started getting way too emotional the beginning of this cycle and it seemed to just escalate with clomid in the mix. I know it's not all the fertility medicines fault, but my emotions hit me all at once. I was told after 3 days of clomid to stop it because I was feeling anxiety, panic attacks and depression pretty hard. I hate to say it, but if my hormones started getting this out of whack with clomid I'd hate to see what would happen with IUI or IVF. I've seen people's hormones get completely screwed up with their protocol and it worries me how I'd react. Husband and I haven't discussed it, but I think we may be calling it all off. Not TTC naturally, but calling off fertility medicines in general. I don't know what is next when you cannot handle the medicine's side effects.
I'm starting therapy, which will be good for me in general. There's more issues I'm having then just infertility and miscarriages (I'm kind of going through a mid-life crisis a tad earlier on my part) so it'll be nice to get help. Although I'm not sure if my counselor is someone I'll stick with. I'll give her a chance and see how it goes since I've only had one session with her which was just a get to know each other thing. I just don't know if she'll be able to offer me the support and help I need.
Otherwise not much to report. My BBT is screwed up - has been higher then normal temperatures. Sadly between my emotions, my mother asking if I was pregnant, and my higher then normal pre-o temps I decided to test. Well, duh, BFN. What did I expect? LOL. I wish I could figure it all out. I guess it's good I have an appointment to talk to my ob/gyn (I think I concerned the nurse which is why she scheduled an appointment) on the 12th but I honestly don't know what to expect the conversation will be like.
I want to say I'm sorry to all the bloggers I usually follow. I do keep up reading everyone's updates, I've just been more of a lurker and haven't commented on anyone's blog lately. Sorry! Promise I do care, even though I don't comment.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
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2 comments:
Krystal- I think you need to do what makes sense for you. But, I will say this, I have been on every fertility drug out there and only clomid caused me panic attacks, to leave my job, and complete anxiety. Seriously. I will also say Femara did not do this to me, and is still a relatively easy drug to take. (It even gave me a BFP twice.) But, if you think it's time to call it quits, that is okay too, whatever you need. I just wanted to share my experiences. Good luck...
Sending you hugs and love!
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