Primary and secondary infertility. Recurrent pregnancy loss. PCOS. Insulin Resistance. Low progesterone. Vitamin D deficient. 3 1/2 years and 3 (more) clomid cycle cautiously expecting #2!

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Nervous, excited and everything in between!

This was yesterday, 10 dpo. Those lovely digitals make it so there is no ignoring the obvious fact - I'm pregnant! And scared. And so very nervous. In 3 days it will be 7 months since my miscarriage and I know how worried I am about a repeat. In a way I regret testing so early just because now I'm left with the wonder of how this pregnancy will go. Hopefully that worry will ease up over the next few months, but I cannot blame myself for questioning it all. I'm excited as can be, of course... and amazed we're pregnant again. I'm only 3 weeks 4 days pregnant and have already started thinking down the road - about what to do with the nursery, if we want another cartoon theme (I'm leaning on no this round), etc etc. And I'm already getting on the ball health-wise. Obviously aiming to lose weight has gone out the window, but I will be eating more lean meats, fruits and vegetables. And exercising to WATP and pregnancy videos a few times a week. Doing something small and I know I'll lose weight in the beginning but that's not a bad thing. I won't be doing it on purpose though... but since I am starting this journey overweight it's going to be healthier for me in the end.

So far my mom, my husband and my best friend know. None of them will be telling any one they know - at least no one in my immediate family and friends will know for a while. In a month or so I'll let my sister in law who is dealing with infertility know, once I feel in a safer zone. I want her to know first before we visit for the family reunion in July (I'll be 18 weeks then) because I know how I felt when our other sister in law sent the most impersonal E-mail announcing her pregnancy after my miscarriage. It was painful. I'm not doing the same thing to my other SIL that I love. She will know first and through the phone... I hope she handles it well but I'm praying she finds out she is pregnant soon too.

I'm thinking of starting a new blog - one I could post about my pregnancy so any one dealing with infertility doesn't have to read about it unless they want to. I'll post a link in the future.


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